The Client Paradox
Even the sharpest people can become surprisingly naive the moment they become a client.
It’s a funny thing I’ve noticed over the years. No matter how brilliant or accomplished someone is in their own field, the moment they step into a construction or design project for the first time, a strange transformation occurs. All the strategic thinking, the long-term planning, the very qualities that made them successful, seem to just fall out the window.
I was talking to a contractor about this the other day. He was venting about a client who was being, let’s be honest, a little unreasonable. “Why are they like this?” he asked, exasperated. “They’re smart people, they run their own businesses. They should understand!”
I had to laugh. “Even smart people become dumb when they become clients,” I told him. It’s like one of nature’s unwritten rules. You can’t fight it.
Suddenly, the primary focus narrows to a single point: money. How much is this going to cost me? How do I get the absolute best quality for the cheapest possible price? It’s the classic consumer mindset, but in the complex world of design and construction, it’s a dangerous oversimplification. The ego gets involved. A small delay feels like a personal betrayal; a necessary change order feels like you’re being cheated. All that business acumen that got you ahead in your career vanishes, and you start thinking in the short term.
I was reminded of this during a recent meeting with a new client. We were in the early stages, walking them through our process—how we handle documentation, how we tender projects to invite multiple quotes, and so on.
“Great,” the client said, nodding confidently. “So you’ll get us one really high quote from a top-tier contractor, one medium, and one low, right?”
“Absolutely not,” I replied, maybe a little more bluntly than I intended. He looked surprised. I had to take a step back and remember that I wasn’t born with this knowledge; I’ve earned these lessons through scars and costly mistakes. There was a time when I probably thought the exact same thing.
I explained my reasoning. “What’s the point of getting a lowball quote from a contractor whose standards are so far below ours that we’d never actually hire them? And what’s the point of getting a quote from a premium contractor if their price is far beyond your budget and the project’s needs? We’d just be wasting everyone’s time.”
My job isn’t to present a meaningless spectrum of prices. It’s to find the right partners for the project—contractors in that upper-middle sweet spot who can deliver the quality we require within a realistic budget. For this particular project, we were the lead consultants. A lot of the project management and oversight that a premium contractor would charge for was already covered in our scope. The client didn’t need to pay for it twice.
He got it, thankfully. But the exchange stuck with me. Most of my clients are incredibly sharp—often far more successful in their respective fields than I am. I have immense respect for what they’ve accomplished. Which is why I find it so fascinating that we can so easily switch off that professional part of our brain. We know how to do due diligence in our own businesses. We know how to ask probing questions, check credentials, and think strategically.
Yet, as soon as we become the customer, we forget. We let our guard down and then act surprised when we get taken for a ride. It’s a paradox: we know better, but we don’t always act like it. We’re still dealing with a business, we’re just not acting like one. Wouldn’t it make more sense to keep playing the same game?